Holiness

It seems like the times that I have the most things to say are the times that I am least likely to post. Partly, I think this is due to the fact that it takes me so long to wade through all of my thoughts and make sense of them. Partly it is because I am literally spending my time addressing the things I am thinking about instead of writing about them.

But holiness has been on my mind of late. I don't think I realized it until my pastor's sermon this past Sunday. He addressed holiness, and I thought, "yup, that's exactly what I've been pondering."

What does it mean to be holy and to live every part of my life as to the Lord? There have been several things that God has called to mind over the last few weeks and months. They have been fresh on my mind for quite some time, but I am only slowly beginning to see how to live some of these things out. After the sermon on Sunday, I pulled a book off the shelf in the family room that I read about ten years ago. I wasn't very impressed with it when I read it, so I don't know why I kept it - until Sunday rolled around. It is called The Pursuit of Holiness by Jerry Bridges. I thought I'd give it a read. (It's short too! YEEHAA!)

After reading the first eight or nine chapters, I spent some time journalling and trying to get some perspective. While disjointed journal type posts don't make for the most enjoyable reading, I thought I would share a few exerpts from my journal. This might be the best I can do to formulate a post right now.

• Need a God-centered perspective: stop viewing sin as "defeat." Holiness has nothing to do with me feeling victorious, rather it is about doing God's will. Not sinning because I want some sort of victory is totally self-centered. I should keep myself from sinning simply because it displeases God.

• "Accepting with contentment whatever circumstances God allows for me is very much a part of a holy walk." (Bridges, p. 69.)

• God shows his standard of holiness through the Scriptures: "The natural result of seeing God's standard and our sinfulness is the awakening within us of a desire to be holy." (Bridges, p 73.)

• Depending on God for holiness means:
• consistently taking in the Word with a humble heart
• praying for holiness

• God will reveal the sin to me. My own responsibility in pursuing holiness is obedience.

• Areas of unholiness in my life:
• desire for self-glorification: wanting importance, recognition
• selfishness that fuels anger towards my family, most often in the form of the "what about me" attitude
• laziness or complaining regarding housework: all that I do can be done in worship to Him if I am doing my work as unto the Lord.
• complaining in general: there is just never a good reason for it.
• not getting up before the kids to spend time with God: I know how much better this has worked for me in the past, so the fact that I don't do it sheer self-indulgence.
• overeating

So there you have it. Me. What's in my head. What I am working on. And what God is working in me.

Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me and know my anxious thoughts;
See if there be any hurtful way in me,
And lead me in the everlasting way.

-Psalm 139:23-24