Thursday, October 28, 2004


Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.
Ecclesiastes 7:9

Anger is crippling. I think there are a lot of people out there who are angry because they don't know what else to do with the hurts they experience. I have dealt with anger of varying degrees at different times in my life. And every time I do, it seems that I am miserable until I let God take care of it... or maybe take care of me is more accurate. I have heard people talk (usually with disdain) about using God as a crutch. But, what truth they speak! If I didn't have God to lean on in these times of anger (among other things) I would be completely miserable. But His power is made perfect in (my) weakness. When I am weak, then I am strong... because he frees me from the miserable trap of my anger.

Yet, I am still learning.

I could go on about the newest homestudy snafu, but it really isn't worth it. Suffice to say, I am "quickly provoked." The more important issue is how I am dealing with it. I believe God is using this process to refine me. I am getting better at trusting him with stuff, but sometimes, when things go wrong, I still get really PO'd. I am trying to reconcile how I can trust God with things, yet deal properly with the emotions when stuff goes wrong. I stew about things for a few hours when they happen. And all the while I can hear God telling me to bring it to him, and he will help me let go of the anger.

So, for all of you who are praying for us during this adoption, please pray that I would respond correctly and that I would not hold on to my anger. Pray that I would remember that these events are not just delays in the process, but they are meant to make me more like Him. (And that my attitude would reflect that!) Of course, if you want to pray that we don't run into any more obstacles, that would be great too!

Next post: kindness.

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